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Stanley D. Currier Archive: Some Hillary Jokes

Hillary: "You promised that I would be President!" Devil: "You promised that you had a soul." Bellboy: "Would you like me to carry your bag up to your room, Mr. Clinton?" Bill: "You mean Hillary's also staying at this hotel????......<awkward>...Say, there's $350 bucks in it for you if you don't tell her about my little friend here." Bellboy: "Would you like me to carry your bag up to your room, Mr. Clinton?" Bill: "No thanks. Hillary just had a shot of Diazepam and she should be able to make it up there all by herself once she stops shaking." Bellboy: "Would you like me to carry your bag up to your room, Mr. Clinton?" Bill: "That's not a bag, that's my wi.....uh, on second thought, you might have to - she just collapsed again." Hillary is truly an inspiration to all young women everywhere.  She showed them that if you work really hard at an elite school, get ...
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 "You've reached 911. Para inglés marque el uno." "1" "Please listen carefully, as our menu options have recently changed: To report a microaggression, press 1; To report a suspected noose sighting or other hate crime, press 2; To report systemic transphobia or misogyny, press 3; To report a violent crime in progress, press 4..." "4" "Thank you for your call.  We are experiencing an unusually high call volume.  There are four customers ahead of you. Please stay on the line and the next available 911 customer service representative will be with you shortly." "♫..♪....♫♫♫....♫..." (blip) "♫..♪....♫♫♫....♫..." (blip) "♫..♪....♫♫♫....♫..." (blip) "♫..♪....♫♫♫....♫..." (blip) "♫..♪....♫♫♫....♫..." "Hello, this call is being monitored for quality assurance. How may I direct your call?" "Help! I am being chased by a man with a knife..." "OK, you are being transferre...
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